I was pissed. He was calm. I was pissed he was calm. He worked. I stayed awake. He called and the madness went away. He is a jerk – a complete and total idiot. Hell has no place for the both of us when we bicker. It’s fun..exhilarating..exhausting..cute.. sometimes. I’ll still say sorry – because that’s just who I am.
To all who'll read... I guess
So I know I’ve been gone for such a long time after saying all those really cool stuff about my life being in a good place, right now. And honestly, the past posts were just reblogs (reposts actually) of past works. I know! Shameless. *hides my face under my invisibility cloak*
Anyway, this right here is a declaration of war! Oh yes earthlings! Henceforth, I will wage war with none other than PERFECTION and PROCRASTINATION! That’s right! You read right. The reason I haven’t been writing and posting too often (unless it’s Twitter or YT comments) is because I am just too lazy. And yes, laziness can sometimes stem from the constant need for perfection.
Lately, I have been through a series of achievements that I feel my writings have not been at par as to where they were before. I am not one to constantly look at my traffic but when you constantly look at your phone all day, you begin to wonder … “Hey, let’s see how my blog is doing even when I didn’t post anything. Did anyone comment? Do I have a new follower?” And I know this is a little too low for my readers who also know me in personal life but yeah.. apparently, a series of achievements makes you a little more vain. In any case, what I am trying to say is that this is my only reason and as a writer,which I fully claim to be, is a lame … the lamest reason there is to give! There have been times when a good line would get stuck in my head for days but I would just neglect it because picking up the pen and scribbling it is just so frigging tiring! That and my My Gel just vanishes whenever I need it. I swear to G! It does! For reals!
So … this is in a way a commitment. I will probably still write too many halfheartedly written drafts but then the intent is for me to actually get to writing A LOT again. I haven’t had enough of this site yet, which is an accomplishment in itself and I sure would like to reconnect with the followers I’ve had from the beginning and those I’ve been sharing witty banters with. Either way, I would like to get back in the game and make my pen do its familiar caper on my journal. There is no need for me to say this but I wanted to type something away so my workmates will think I’m busy and not bother me before the end of my shift. Hah! Sssssshh.. Do not tell them! Until then, my lovely little peeps!
Did you miss me?
Somehow, being away from it all will give me closure. Somehow, some way I will make it through and accept the truth. It will not be easy, yes. But knowing he is happy will make me happy too. I thank him for all he has done. I thank him for all the memories we have shared and will continue to share. Although this time, I will no longer be bothered with the trivial stuff and no more doubts will cloud my mind. What we had, whatever it was, had been fun while it lasted. I will always care. Always.
Somehow, knowing he is happy, will be enough.
1: I was the one who loved you most, but between us, you lost more. For someday, I can love someone the way I loved you, but you will never be loved again the way that I loved you.
2: I may not find someone that will love me as much as you did, but can assure you I will love them the way you wished I would love you.
Picked this up somewhere and just thought I’d share it. You know, for all of us out there who can relate.cute puppy eyes
Sometimes we say the words we do not mean. Sometimes we say the words that we do not actually feel, or believe in.
Sometimes, the very words that come out of our mouth, are the ones untrue.
And yet, though we know this, we repeat them still.
And because we do, time then comes, when we no longer know what we really believe in. When we no longer know the difference from the false ones and the true.
When all that’s left is to push through with the lie and live on through.
After all, it is not the words that come out of your mouth that people remember. They have bearing, I say to you. But what people will remember and will pass on to other generations, are the actions we do. Despite everything we said – true or untrue.
– An Original